Usenet Flame Form
Instructions: 1) Check All That Apply in Each Category.
2) Post As A Reply to Usenet Drivel.
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Dear:
[ ] Clueless Newbie [ ] Lamer [ ] AOLer [ ] Meee tooooo'er
[ ] Troll [ ] Pervert [ ] Dumbass [ ] Idiot
[ ] Loser [ ] Scammer [ ] Spammer [ ] Moron
[ ] Nazi pig [ ] (censored) [ ] Dickhead [ ] Header Forger
[ ] Scumbag [ ] Bigot [ ] Fed [ ] Monkey Spank
[ ] Dumbass who can't find the CAPS LOCK button [ ] Lousy Parent
You Are Being Flamed Because:
[ ] You suck [ ] Your sig sucks
[ ] You posted a MEEE TOOOOOO! [ ] You piss me off
[ ] You started an off-topic thread [ ] You're an idiot
[ ] You crossposted to more than five newsgroups
[ ] You posted a "What is Netscape?"
[ ] You posted a "How do I turn these characters into a picture?"
[ ] You posted an attempt to defend America Online
[ ] You posted racist, anti-semetic, or otherwise prejudiced [garbage]
[ ] You posted an ad where it isn't welcome
[ ] You posted a non-binary to a binaries newsgroup
[ ] You posted a binary to a non-binaries newsgroup
[ ] You posted an argument that has been made a googol times
[ ] You posted an argument that has been made a googolplex times
[ ] You posted an argument, then contradicted yourself
[ ] You posted another "You all suck" message
[ ] You posted a request for warez sites
[ ] You posted a request for warez
[ ] You posted a request for AOHell
[ ] You posted a lame attempt at phishing
[ ] You quoted an ENTIRE post and added a one line reply
[ ] You quoted an ENTIRE post and didn't add any reply
[ ] You posted with a subject that tells nothing about your message
[ ] You posted a one or two line message that makes no sense
[ ] You posted a blank message
[ ] You asked if anyone on this newsgroup is more than X years old
[ ] You started a long, stupid thread
[ ] You continued a long, stupid thread
[ ] You revived a long dead thread
[ ] You posted an obvious troll
[ ] You posted pretending to be someone you're not (See "troll" above)
[ ] You posted using a forged header
[ ] You e-mailed a reply to a message with a forged header
[ ] You posted a stupid pyramid money making scheme
[ ] You posted some other make money quick scam
[ ] You posted in ElItE CaPiTaLs hoping everybody will think you're cool
[ ] You posted basically the same thing multiple times
[ ] You let your kid access your account, with disasterous results
[ ] You posted flame bait
To Repent, You Must:
[ ] Give up posting for a week [ ] Post something that makes sense
[ ] Give up masturbating for a week [ ] Post a public apology
[ ] Cancel your AOL account [ ] Read the FAQ
[ ] Learn about netiquette [ ] Type FORMAT C: and press enter
[ ] Bust up your modem with a hammer and eat it
[ ] Bust up your hard drive with a hammer and eat it
[ ] Jump into a bathtub while holding your monitor
[ ] Park your car in your garage, get in, close the garage door,
and let the engine hum you to sleep
[ ] Go step in front of a cement truck
[ ] Forward your post to your postmaster, perhaps he's interested
[ ] Be the guest of honor in alt.flame for a week
[ ] Only use your real name when you post from now on
[ ] Go tell your mother/father/test tube they failed
[ ] Age 10 more years before you post again
[ ] All of the above
[ ] Other ______________________________
In Closing, I'd Like to Say:
[ ] Blow me [ ] (censored)
[ ] Go to hell [ ] Eat [garbage]
[ ] Shut (censored) up from now on [ ] I pity your dog
[ ] Never post again [ ] Get a clue, you pathetic loser
[ ] Take your [garbage] somewhere else
[ ] Learn to post or get the (censored) off Usenet
[ ] Write your advertisement on a piece of paper, roll it up
really tight, and cram it up your (censored)
[ ] All of the above
------------------------------ End of Form Flame ------------------------------